My Day in Court

So, after two days in the hospital, today I was in court.

No, I'm not in trouble. I was actually in a courtroom preparing to testify in a sticky little legal situation here in my adopted hometown of Gainesville, FLA. Unfortunately, I am no stranger to courtrooms. If I never have to be in another one, I will consider myself one fortunate dude.

Courtrooms are the stage upon which life's misery is acted out every day. They're kind of like doctor's offices or emergency rooms, I suppose; nobody goes to the doctor because they're feeling great. If you're there, chances are you've got a problem.

Courtrooms are, by definition, adversarial. Somebody is always against somebody else. That's probably why I don't like them...except, that I realized again today that I actually sort of do. Like them, I mean.

This could be mildly perverse, I'm thinking. In a courtroom, you are allowed-- as long as you're quiet and follow the bailiff's rules-- to sit and observe evidence of the most outrageous claims and behaviors imaginable. People in courtrooms are mean to each other. I guess that's why they're in a courtroom. It is entertaining at times; I mean, really, some of the things that happen there crack me up.

Nothing gets held back in the courtroom. This could be the source of the 70's catchphrase, "let it all hang out." Accusal. Denial. Outrage (moral and otherwise.) Penitence. Dysfunction. The "Evil Eye." I witnessed all of these things today. And that was just the first case.

I actually feel a great deal of pity for most of the people I meet when I go to courtrooms. The people who are sitting in the gallery are the families, loved ones, and parties affected by the actions of the folks back there in the lockup. Most of them didn't really do anything to deserve the misery they are being exposed to.

Court. What a wacky place to be, and a heckuva way to make a living. Kudos to the clerks, reporters, judges and officers who make it happen and keep it orderly. But I hope you'll excuse me if I don't make it back any time soon.

I'm going to be practicing the "Evil Eye."

That's What Friends Are For

I have three friends-- who shall remain nameless-- who have not seen each other often over the years, but who remain good friends, nonetheless. Soon, they will get together for a weekend or so to do who knows what. Whatever friends do, I suppose.

When I learned about this forthcoming event, I was both piquantly delighted and insanely jealous. I don't have that many friends, and certainly very few with whom I can spend a weekend (or, perhaps more accurately, would want to spend a weekend.)

This is nothing against the friends that I have; they are good enough as friends go. It's more a matter of time, distance, juxtaposition, and circumstance, I think. I suspect that most of us live this way.

We have jobs, families, responsibilities, things to do. We might imagine that a carefree weekend with a good friend or two would be a worthwhile adventure. But we just never seem quite to get "a round tuit," as another friend of mine says.

("If I could just find one of those round tuits," my friend laments, "there are so many things I could catch up on!" My friend is amused by this.)

As I advance toward the latter half of my life, I am beginning to wonder if more of us ought not to act like my three friends.

What the heck, whatever it takes...let's plan a get-together and do more than plan it. Let's do it.

Let's carve a slice out of life and spend it on each other. Let's drink the wine and toast the extravagance of the moment. Let's savor this bit of the all-too-brief appearance we make on the grand stage that is living.

I think you're on to something, ladies. I think you've figured it out.

That's what friends are for.

A Lesson in Love

Kelly taught me something today.

Kelly and her fiance, Towns-- really bright, young graduate students at the University of Florida-- joined our church a few months ago, were baptized together in July, and are scheduled to be married in our sanctuary in May next year. I was supposed to begin premarital counseling with them today; instead, I was visiting them in the hospital. It's something I get to do a lot with my job. Some days I'm better at it than others. Today I have to admit I was a little shaky.

Towns and Kelly were heading out for a weekend celebration for her birthday when an elderly driver became disoriented, entered the interstate heading in the wrong direction, and met their car head-on...at a combined impact speed of 140 mph.

The other driver died. Towns received a fractured spine, two broken ankles, and multiple contusions all over his body. Kelly cracked several ribs, broke her arm, and thought the whole episode was a dream (she had fallen asleep in the car while they were traveling.) Needless to say, they are fortunate to be alive...and they know it.

As Kelly recounted the events of the past 48 hours, she talked about how she had become so focused on her priority list of things she needed to do to get ready for her wedding, moving out of her current apartment, managing her part-time job and full-time graduate studies. Then, she said, she was in a wreck...a wreck where she should have died.

She stopped talking for a moment-- looked straight at me-- and said, "Boy, was I focused on the wrong things. None of that stuff really matters. People matter."

For a man who makes his living with words, I couldn't really find any. I just nodded my head while my mind tried to absorb the enormity and the truthfulness of what she was saying. Thankfully, her phone rang and, while she chatted with a friend, I had a minute to recover.

As she prepared to hang up, she said to her friend, "Thanks for calling, and I love you!" And then, with a little bit of a sheepish grin on her face, she said, "I also figured out it's a good thing to tell people that you love them."

Lesson learned Kelly. Thank you.

I love you, too.

I Love Football...But at What Price?

I don't really want to be too heavy this morning; after all, it's a Saturday in the Fall, which means it's football time! Especially here in the sunny Southeast, the air is filled with the sounds of "Roll Tide!", "Go Gators!", "War Eagle!"-- and "Don't Get Beat Too Bad, Tennessee!" (Alas, how the mighty have fallen!)

I do love me some football, no doubt about it. I check high school football scores in the local paper, I set my schedule so I can take in Game Day, I peruse the schedule of the day's televised games. With the marvelous advent of ESPN3.com, I can even extend my fanaticism to the online world. Who'd a thunk we'd have so much access to high-quality football media all those years ago when I huddled with my dad around the AM radio, listening to John Ward as the "Voice of the Vols" calling every exciting play?

But I must also admit that my over-indulgent football conscience feels more than just a bit guilty when I stop and think about the high price we are paying, particularly on the intercollegiate level, in order to get our pigskin fix. Sometimes, I just want to stop and ask: "Have we lost our minds?"

The head coach at my local university-- a major SEC school-- makes more money in 14 games than the President of the United States will earn during his entire four-year term. Fourteen GAMES! After all, that's what they are. Young boys hurling their bodies at dangerously high speeds, chasing an oblong leather ball, while multiplied thousands of rabid fans cheer them on-- as long as they WIN, by golly!

Over and over and over we hear about the "hidden costs" of the pressure put upon players and coaches alike at major college programs. Head coach suffers heart palpitations...key player sidelined with concussion...players arrested for "off the field" violations...BIG money changing hands in order to keep prominent alumni happy.

There is so very much to be said on the positive side for the development of the scholar-athlete model in colleges and universities around the nation. Many young people who would not otherwise have an opportunity for a post-secondary education are allowed access because of their athletic prowess. And certainly, the "big revenue" sports like football help to pay the freight for less popular endeavors, such as lacrosse, softball, gymnastics, etc.

But when do we-- and I include myself here, dressed head-to-toe in orange and white-- stop and really ask the question: at what price, "success?"

I Googled the search term, "player dies after practice" today; there were 6,380,000 hits returned. One of them is the story of a local player here in central Florida who passed away just two weeks ago. He was 15 and "living the dream" of competing on the college, and perhaps professional, level some day.

(Read the story here to learn of the all-too short life of Olivier Louis.)

There are lots of good coaches, lots of good players, lots of good fans, and even lots of good reasons to continue to support football and other athletic programs for our young people. I just hope we can gain some perspective at some point, and remember that it's just a game. Life is more than sports.

Ask Mrs. Louis.

The GOP Pledge

O, Grand Old Party, whence have ye been hijacked?

The current yay-hoos who have infiltrated the ranks of the Republican Party have issued a "Pledge to America." We are supposed to be impressed, I suppose, with the high-sounding language and noble aspirations contained therein. Sorry boys, but I'm not smellin' what the Rock is cookin'!

What we have here is a failure to say anything really new...these are recycled ideas from the failed policies of yesteryear. Even their fellow Republicans are smart enough to look at the numbers and say, "Hey, wait a minute...something just doesn't add up here!"

To wit-- The cornerstone of the proposal is the "permanent" extension of the Bush-era tax cuts of 2001 and 2003. Rep. Boehner and his clan salivate like Pavlov's dogs every time anybody rings that bell. Of course, that adds, in round numbers, about 400 billion dollars a year to the national deficit each year for the next 10 years. This is (supposedly) balanced by their ingenious plan to "roll back government spending to pre-stimulus, pre-bailout levels, saving us at least $100 billion in the first year alone." 

Now let me see...I was never very good at math. No, that's not true, I was actually pretty doggone good at math. That means we're LOSING $300 billion a year, IDIOTS!

They also "pledge" to repeal the infamous and somehow sinister "Obamacare" health care legislation-- oh, but there are certain parts of that legislation that they really like, so of course they won't touch those. They want to protect the people's rights not to be denied coverage for pre-existing conditions, and they will, of course, not be mean to seniors, veterans, or our troops. 

(Interesting that these are probably the most costly of the features included in the current law, so I'm not sure exactly how they're going to preserve them but not have to pay for them. Maybe the insurance companies will just roll over and play dead while we all take a turn at picking THEIR pockets for once!  Snicker, snicker...)


They also love to play the "strong defense" card in these discussions; hey, I believe in a strong national defense and hold immense respect and pride in our men and women (including the gay ones) that make up our armed forces. But, come on, GOP'ers...you say you want to increase our defense spending, NOT on more troops, better training, or safer equipment...but on MISSILES! Basically, defense spending already outstrips every other portion of the Federal budget, including those dreaded "entitlements" that get you so riled up. 

How in the heck are you going to pay for more missiles AND lower the deficit at the same time?


Okay, that's about enough out of me for now. I think I'll just close with a quote from "one of their own," Erick Erickson, who is editor of the conservative website redstate.com. Mr. Erickson summed up the substance of the GOP Pledge to America with these words:


"It is full of mom-tested, kid-approved pablum that will make certain hearts on the right sing in solidarity. But like a diet full of sugar, it will actually do nothing but keep making Washington fatter before we crash from the sugar high."


Who said I don't like any Republicans?

What's This I Hear About an "Obama Tax Hike?"

I was intrigued when a friend of mine posted a link with the bold title, “Raising Taxes Destroys Jobs” which led to a well-prepared map that encouraged me to “Click on your state to see the tax increases and job losses that will come to your Congressional district with the Obama-Pelosi tax plan.” I did so, and discovered that, purportedly, my current home state of Florida will lose more than 47,000 jobs in the next two years if the US Congress does not vote to keep the tax cuts enacted under President George W. Bush in 2001. (The map can be see here http://heritageforamerica.org/jobs-lost-in-your-district/.)

While duly impressed with the technology represented by the clickable map, I was somewhat disappointed to see that there were no further explanations offered for how such bold figures were arrived at. There were no links to research or reports...just a large button that would enable me to EMAIL YOUR CONGRESSMAN! To my friend’s credit, she was able to tell me that the research had been prepared by the Heritage Foundation and had been referenced by South Carolina Senator Jim DeMint. This gave me enough to go on to find the report and read it for myself.

The full report is listed as “Obama Tax Hikes: The Economic and Fiscal Effects,” and is also known as Center for Data Analysis Report #10-07. (The entire report may be found here: http://www.heritage.org/Research/Reports/2010/09/Obama-Tax-Hikes-The-Economic-and-Fiscal-Effects) I found it to be fascinating reading, and would simply like to list some of the more striking details I observed:

The report opens with these words – “The Members of the U.S. House and Senate are about to engage in one of the most consequential tax policy debates of the past 50 years. At stake is the nation’s tax policy. For 14 years, Congress after Congress has voted to lighten the tax burden on taxpayers.... If Congress enacts the Obama tax hike, it will have changed the course of long-standing tax policy.”

Long-standing tax policy? 14 years makes a long-standing policy? The last time I checked, our nation was over 229 years old...14 years is only 6% of our nation’s history.

Of course, what is being touted as an “Obama tax hike” is actually the natural expiration of the tax cuts passed by Congress in 2001, under the administration of President George W. Bush. Under bipartisan agreement at that time, Congress wisely left a ten-year limit on the tax cut package so that their effect on our economic standing could be evaluated. If successful, the tax cuts could be renewed; if considered detrimental, they would expire. Clean, simple. Not really a “tax hike,” though.

As the writers of the report continue, they state that every one of their calculations and recommendations are based on the concept that the Bush tax cuts of 2001 and 2003 are good for America, and that renewing these cuts are the basis for sound financial policy on a national level. However, they are honest enough to state this: “While the jury is still out on the overall economic effects of Bush-era tax relief, these two changes to tax policy, particularly the 2003 legislation, likely boosted economic activity and strengthened the macro economy.”

Excuse me? The jury is still out? That doesn’t sound like a very sound basis for proceeding with a decisive national economic plan. The Bush-era tax cuts likely “boosted” economic activity and “strengthened” the macro economy? Is that why we ended up in the mother of all recessions in 2008? Wasn’t it President Bush himself who had to enact the economic stimulus package in an effort to reverse the effects of his tax cut proposals?

I’d like for the writers of this report, who continually hold forth the predicted devastation of “small business owners” under the forthcoming Obama tax proposals, to actually interview a small business owner like my sister, Cindy Lay, in Knoxville, TN—a long-time and loyal Republican, by the way. How did that “boosted” economic activity and “strengthened” macro economy work out for you, my sister? Do these people who work for “think tanks” ever pull their heads out and come into the real world?

But I digress....

The report goes on to state, “Center for Data Analysis economists estimated the likely economic and fiscal effects of the Obama tax plan by introducing it into a model of the U.S. economy that leading government agencies and Fortune 500 companies use to produce economic forecasts.” This model is designed and owned by IHS Global Insight, Inc. It is, indeed, used by private-sector and government economists to estimate how changes in the economy and public policy are likely to affect major economic indicators.

Of course, the report also says, “The methodologies, assumptions, conclusions, and opinions presented here are entirely the work of analysts in the Center for Data Analysis at The Heritage Foundation. They have not been endorsed by, and do not necessarily reflect the views of, the owners of the Global Insight model.” One might be mindful of the quote attributed to Mark Twain (and later, British statesman Benjamin Disraeli,) “There are three types of lies—lies, damn lies, and statistics!”

The real issue may be revealed in one other piece of the report’s language: “The President’s budget proposal calls for the repeal of the Bush tax cuts for high-income earners, and an extension—albeit temporary—of these tax cuts for ‘middle class’ earners (individuals earning less than $200,000 per year and households earning less than $250,000 per year).... Allowing this current policy to expire for any income-earning group can be interpreted in no other way than as a tax increase.”

Notice that the “any income-earning group” of that last sentence is those making $200,000 and above! The report actually concedes that middle-class earners will NOT receive a tax increase, though the aforementioned map and chart uses dramatic numbers like the $33 billion “increase” in Florida taxes over the next 10 years as fodder for the anger of the masses. I’ve got news for you folks: it ain’t the masses they’re looking out for!

As a final note, I would highly, highly suggest that you read the editorial from the Los Angeles Times by Garret Gruener, the founder of Ask.com. As one of the “richest 1%” that are so often referred to in the tax debate, Mr. Gruener makes a compelling case for allowing the Bush tax cuts to expire as planned. The title of his essay is “Yes, Tax Me More.” You can find it here: http://articles.latimes.com/2010/sep/20/opinion/la-oe-gruener-tax-the-rich-20100920